Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Emotion-less or Emotion-Management?

I would cry all the time in the past for the smallest, darnest things..
I cried when I left USJ to go back home so many times in the past years.
I cried when I had to leave Kuching to come back to USJ...
I also cried when my friends fought or when I fought with them (or even the slightest arguments)
; and I obviously cried when friends or family left for somewhere (when it comes to deaths, I cry darn lot)

Why then am I so tearless this year? Since the departure of one of my beloved lecturer the Late Ms. Lai.. and a tinge of this and that from the social world - Vic the tear-y is now Vic the tear-less.

I so want to cry but I can't.

I wanted to cry when I left the Student Council - out of relief or sadness to leave, who cares?
I also wanted to cry during the social havoc of Prince Charming.. but I didn't.
I could cry last week when my friends from all over the SEAS including somebody left but I also didn't.

Gee. Why can't I cry? Am I so tear-less only soap operas (fake stuff) make me cry but real events leave me stunned and without tears?

* heart feeling heavy.. too much mixed emotions..

No comments: