Standing on the outside, once more, looking in.
Standing amidst the crowd with a big huge grin, but with a heart so heavy.

I need to realize, and to understand that this is life and it will be painful. It will be difficult and it will be challenging. I can't keep on expecting to smile every day. I need to be realistic and to buck up, otherwise, I'll be left behind, again.

But it just gets so lonely.

You don't rip out the heart of your best friend. You just don't. It's wrong.

Is loneliness really a state of mind or is it really a plague of reality? This is deja vu all over again and I'm not liking it one bit. Walking around the muddy streets my heart is weighed down by the fond memories of just weeks before. But no, time that's past does not return.